The Kari AnnAlysis

Recently on Twitter, Michael Ian Black (@michaelianblack) wrote a tweet that said if you could choose any 5 people to sit down to dinner with, you’d always be the biggest loser (not necessarily in those words, but that sums it up).

So, when I read that, I decided I would work on my seating arrangements for my dinner party. A few of the choices were easy, but a couple took some more thought.

DINNER PARTY GUEST LIST:

1. My Mikey: This was the most obvious choice. I love him and would want him to share this special time with me. Enough said.

2. Albert Einstein: While I know Michael and I could carry on a nice little dinner conversation, I would like to have someone there for him to chat with. So, I chose Albert Einstein.  Michael likes Einstein … and I like his hair. I wonder if he’d let me run my fingers through it?

3. Jesus: I think a lot of people would choose Jesus, but that’s not why I chose him.  I would just like to sit down with him and see what he has to say. I want to know about the time he lived and maybe he could answer some questions for me. I don’t have a list yet, but I’ll work on it.  I’ve tried to read the Bible and the language gets to me, so maybe he could dumb it down for me.

4. John Mulvaney: I thought that I would need someone funny in case the conversation got stale.. so this was my choice. I was afraid if I chose a celebrity funny person, they might not be as funny in person as they are on tv, so I chose John because I know he is funny in person. Plus, John really likes Jesus. He even has the Bible app on his iPhone. I’m sure he could come up with some great questions to ask.

5. This was a toss up between JK Rowling and Janet Evanovich.  I hope to write a book one day and these are two of my favorite authors. I would like to sit down with either or both of them and ask them how they got started, what they are working on (I promise I wouldn’t steal it). I would also see if they had any advice for me.  If I could pick Rowlings brain for a while, I think I would be a happy camper. I mean, I just want to know what’s going on in there, she did create an entirely new world with Harry Potter. I can’t imagine what else she has floating around in there.

When I started this, I was hoping to add someone who would make me not the biggest loser at the table. I was going to add a homeless person, but that kind of made me feel bad for saying they are losers. It would make me look good in front of Jesus, I mean I would be feeding a homeless person… I can’t even finish that sentence because I feel worse now for even thinking that.

In the end, I decided I don’t really care if I am the lamest person at the table. I mean, no matter who comes, someone will always be better than me at something, and there are people that I will be better than at things… except Jesus and I’m ok with that.  Dr Phil, if you’d like me to come on your show, call my agent, I’m pretty deep!

Who would your 5 dinner guests be?

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